Subset Games co-founder Jay Ma went through hell to make Fulcrum Defender

Every video game is a miracle. Long hours, extraordinary technical and artistic requirements and cross-disciplinary collaboration: the very act of making games is difficult, and leaves room for catastrophic errors. It’s a wonder any of them make it to release at all.

Fulcrum Defender, the new Playdate exclusive from Jay Ma, the co-founder of indie darling Subset Games, is one such miraculous game. It’s the first new release from the studio since 2018’s critically acclaimed Into the Breach. Ma began work on Fulcrum Defender following a life-changing Covid infection that has greatly diminished her quality of life and ability to do the thing she loves.

The story of Fulcrum Defender begins following a trip Ma made to Vancouver, Canada in August 2023 to see Subset co-founder Matt Davis and a few other members of the studio in-person. At the time, the team was working on more than one game. According to Ma, one of the larger, more promising projects was “struggling,” but the trip led to a breakthrough. Then, she caught Covid-19. “It was pretty unfortunate timing,” she said. “For the first time in a while, I was gung-ho about being able to figure this game out.”

At first, Ma’s latest bout with the coronavirus didn’t seem all that different from her previous experiences. She returned to her home in Kyoto, Japan, quarantined and eventually recovered from the acute symptoms, but never bounced back completely. “I think it was the first day that I went out to be outside, bike, do normal things, and I just completely shut down,” she said. “I couldn’t get out of bed for like four days.” She realized she was experiencing long Covid.

As we chatted over Google Meet, Ma frequently took long pauses to piece together her memories and find the right words to express her loss. “I’m a different person,” she told me after one such break. “I walk around with a cane. I need to structure exactly how I do something outside. I need to know where all the chairs are. I walk at a grandma’s pace, and I’m constantly forced to maintain awareness of my physical state, because if I do too much, it’s already too late. It makes everything feel dangerous.”

For the first four months of her illness, Ma couldn’t work at all. “Even even when I was more used to needing to pace myself, not only was it harder to do things that used to come naturally to me, but I would also get lost in my own head,” she said. She worried she might never make games again.

Fulcrum Defender was a chance to prove to herself she could still do the thing she loved. Subset’s Mauro López provided additional programming, and composer Aaron Cherof, best known for his work on Minecraft’s Trails and Tails update, made the music for the game. Panic contacted Ma about the project after she showed a few friends the game around the time of Kyoto’s annual Bit Summit indie game festival in the summer of last year.

“I would wake up in the morning and think about the game and make progress every day – even if it was only a couple of hours – that did something really important for my psychological state,” she said.

In a preview released by Panic, Ma describes Fulcrum Defender as a game “that starts out slow and relaxing but gradually ramps up until it becomes frantic chaos.” You can see the connective tissue between it and Ma’s previous work. Players can earn upgrades to make their run easier. Success then depends on a combination of good aim (using the Playdate’s signature crank), smart decision-making and a well thought out build. I expect it will have the same addictive “one more run” quality that Subset’s other games are known for.

“With Into the Breach, if I wanted to add one enemy, that one enemy would change how maps are designed, how character weapons are designed, and how scaling works,” she said. “So a single new idea requires you to kind of keep everything in your head at once, and that specifically is just something that I struggle to do now.” Fulcrum Defender taught Ma how much she had taken for granted the ease with which she one juggled those various dependencies in her mind.

Ma hasn’t found a doctor in Japan who knows enough about the illness to offer her a conclusive diagnosis, and the state of research on long Covid in general is nascent. “They hate to make uncertain calls,” she explained. The one thing she’s found she can do is take frequent dementia tests to track the condition of her mind.

“I feel like I need to live with the possibility that it won’t go away, so I just sort of operate with that mindset,” she told me. “This illness has shrunk my world and perception of time considerably. My memory is way worse. I’ll forget what happened like a week ago, and I don’t really think about the future at all. And so I’m just in a constant present. It feels like I’m being forced to train to be a monk.”

When I asked what her illness might mean for the future of Subset, Ma took a long time to consider her answer. “We set a rule that we will not announce anything unless we’re absolutely certain it’s coming out. We want to live with the freedom of being able to cancel rather than feeling we’re stuck in having to release something we don’t like,” she said. “So Subset is doing fine, but my output has dropped to like 20 percent of what it used to be.”

Davis, she adds, has been productive, but he too has had to adapt his work schedule, in his case due to two young kids. “If we want to make another Into the Breach-scale game, it feels like we might need more help in the long run. I need to come to terms with the fact I can’t do all the art the way I used to.”

Ma has been through so much, and yet Fulcrum Defender isn’t a game about chronic health concerns, disability or memory loss. It seems to studiously avoid borrowing any biographical detail from Ma’s life whatsoever. People will play and enjoy it knowing nothing of the challenging circumstances in which it was made. It turns out, that’s the only way Ma would have it.

“I know of a lot of developers who put themselves into their game. You can see the author’s intent, emotional state and the things they were processing in it. I’ve wondered what it would be like to make a game like that, but I have no idea how. Basically, the only thing that drives me is mechanics,” she told me. “So I have no expectation, or really desire for people to see the author in the little arcade games I make. I would be very happy to never be perceived.”

Fulcrum Defender — along with 11 other games — arrives as part of Playdate’s second season of weekly games beginning on May 29. You can pre-order Season Two for $39 through the Catalog store.

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