Amina and Khaled were waiting for the right opportunity to get together in bed again. But in a family of so many people, it was not so easy. One day, while Amina was combing her hair, Khaled caught her from behind and tried to kiss her. Amina moved his hands away angrily and ran away. She could not afford to take a risk. She could not be a fool. No one should have the slightest hint about their equation. She had to be very cautious.

A few days after that was the “jatra night” in their village. Jatra or yatra, which meant “journey”, is a traditional folk theatre form that has a phenomenal journey of evolution. Its origin goes back to the Bhakti movement propelled by Chaitanya Mahaprabhu, a Hindu religious leader widely worshipped as a reincarnation of Lord Krishna, and thus belonging to the sect of Vaishavism. Jatra was his way of spreading the name and celebrating the glory of Krishna amongst the masses, roaming from place to place in processions while singing and dancing to the tune of religious songs. Eventually, Jatra became the most popular form of theatre across the villages of West Bengal, Odisha and Tripura in India.

In an era when women and children were not supposed to visit theatres and watch cinema, Jatra presented them an escape from the mundane world to a world of pure entertainment and was a welcome relief from the monotony of homemaking. Once or twice every year, the Jatra groups visited the villages and enacted plays in the village playgrounds, mostly during the nights. Tickets had to be bought for these shows. Jatra was considered as one of the finest forms of art, it was in its own unique genre and was greatly popular across the villages of West Bengal. Shirajul and his father loved to watch Jatra and waited for the time of the year when it used to happen in their village. Amina too would wait eagerly for the event. She relished the performance of the beautiful actors on stage. Kajol and Rizul were also crazy about Jatra. Kajol loved dancing and singing, and greatly enjoyed the fun, frolic and drama onstage. She would perform snatches from the plays later before her friends with great enthusiasm. So, on Jatra nights, Shirajul would unfailingly take his family to their village playground, which looked vibrant, with a large, beautifully decorated stage and all lit up with halogen lights. There were hawkers and tea sellers everywhere. During Jatra time, their village looked like a grand fair.

But this year, surprisingly, Amina requested Shirajul to go along with his father and the children and excuse her from it. She said to Shirajul that she felt a fever coming on and would prefer to stay back. Shirajul, who had never forced anything on his wife, went to the show with his father, Kajol and Rizul, leaving Amina back in the house with Khaled. Amina had her own plans for herself and Khaled after everyone left. She waited till Shirajul, her father-in-law and the children set off for Nobir Math, the playground where the shows were staged. After they left, Khaled came to Amina’s room. He saw her lying on the bed. Her long hair was touching the floor as she lay gazing at the ceiling fan. Khaled climbed on the bed and lay by her side. Within moments they were cosy in each other’s arms. Khaled restlessly undressed Amina and himself. Holding her body tight against his, Khaled sucked her lips passionately. Soon their bodies were writhing on the bed as they indulged in intense sex. Amina moaned out of pleasure as Khaled entered her. They panted, now completely lost in each other. Little did they realise that the window of the room had opened with a gust of wind and that Kajol was watching them with burning eyes. They were interrupted mid-way as Kajol shouted, “Ammi!Chachu! Ki kortaso tomra esob?!” and ran away towards the terrace.

Kajol was shocked, appalled and thunderstruck to see her Ammi and her beloved chacha jaan that way. As Kajol remembered the scene she felt disgusted and annoyed. She locked herself in the small room on their terrace. The scene of Khaled making love to her Ammi not only irritated her but also triggered tremendous anger in her. She had come back from the Jatra because her stomach had started to ache badly and she wanted to sleep. She had come back and knocked on the door of their house. But when her mother did not open the door, she thought she must have slept off and tried to call her from the window, only to see her mother and uncle at the nasty act. She was flabbergasted. She puked. She cried. She did not know what to do. A 13-year-old Kajol would never ever be able to fathom what she had seen some minutes before. She was crying like a small child when she heard a knock on the door. Khaled called out to her: “Kajol, please open the door once. Please listen to me.” Kajol shouted at him, “You go from here, Chachu! I do not want to see your face! I will tell everything to Abbu and Boro Abbu once they come back!” Kajol heard her mother’s voice. She spoke softly, “Kajli, please listen to us once! I can explain that it is not the way you are thinking about it. Ek bar dorja ta khol Ma!” Kajol was feeling claustrophobic. Her head was spinning like a top. She opened the door and fell unconscious.

Kajol opened her eyes and saw Khaled and Amina standing in front of her. Amina sobbed while Khaled stood in silence. Both apologised and requested her not to disclose what she had seen to anyone. Amina said Shirajul would throw both her and Khaled out of the house and her father-in-law would kill them. Khaled touched her and promised to leave the house forever. Kajol saw tears in Khaled’s eyes. She loved her chacha more than anyone else in the world. It was her chacha who had named her Kajol despite the kazi naming her Nafisa, since Kajol had unusually beautiful and bright eyes that looked resplendent when kohl was applied to them. Khaled was educated up to matriculation level and believed that all human beings were equal. He would often speak of Hindus and Muslims being two sides of the same coin. He had always encouraged Kajol and Rizul to befriend other children irrespective of their religious identity. Kajol has always considered him as her ideal. Kajol could not take the pain of her dearest chachu and his tears melted her heart. She asked both to swear on her name not to repeat what they had done ever. They swore on her name. Kajol forgave them and asked them to forget the episode.

Almost three months passed since that incident and Kajol had not opened her mouth in front of anyone about the incident and acted as if she had forgotten it. Sometimes she visualized her mother intimate in bed with her chacha. Khaled had gone nowhere and only talked of leaving the house and creating his own business whenever he saw Kajol. Amina remained quiet and performed all the household chores. There was no synergy between Amina, Khaled and Kajol. And then it happened.

Kajol must have been 16 or 17 when she fell seriously ill post her menstrual cycle. She had frequent cramps and intermittent phases of abdominal bleeding. The hakim advised Shirajul to take Kajol to the big hospital in the city and consult a gynaecologist. Since it was the crop season and Shirajul was busy in the fields, he asked Amina and Khaled to take Kajol to the city hospital. The three boarded the express train from Hasnabad in the early morning of the following day. It was raining cats and dogs when they reached the city railway station named Sealdah. Kajol walked uncomfortably while Amina and Khaled held her on either side. When they reached the bus stop, Khaled hired a yellow taxi and asked Amina and Kajol to get into it. He sat beside the driver. As the taxi ran through the wide street it started raining torrentially. Amina wiped Kajol’s face with the end of her saree affectionately. Kajol felt sleepy. She slept off in Amina’s lap.

On opening her eyes, Kajol saw herself in a dark room. There was a foul smell that made her feel like vomiting. She could feel an excruciating pain in her stomach. She saw a woman standing next to the bed and giggling. She was very fat and ugly. Kajol was scared. She asked for her mother and chacha . The woman laughed like a devil and said, “Tor aami r chacha tore 20,000 takaye Sonagachir te beche geche re meye!” Kajol could not believe her words. Her mother and uncle had sold her to a brothel? She yelled in anger and called for her mother and uncle, but no one came. Kajol shouted again and again, but her voice was too feeble to reach her mother or her uncle, who had perhaps run away after selling her to the brothel. Kajol closed her eyes in fear and hatred. It was all dark.

“Kajol O Kajol!” Aapa’s broken voice woke up Kajol from her slumber. Last night had been a riot as all of them had partied wildly under “Kanada Bridge” (Kennedy Bridge) till dawn. Kajol needed a break, and so did Aapa, Annu and Rani. It was not that she enjoyed spreading her legs before strangers, but Kajol always felt that women, no matter how educated they were and what jobs they were in, must spread their legs. Either the world fucks them or men do. Kajol did not regret being a slut in Kamathipura. Rather, she felt proud and held her head high. It had been more than two decades since Kajol’s mother and uncle had sold her off in the brothel of Sonagachi in Kolkata. Kajol had tried every means of escape and revolt. She had refused to be a slut and had got beaten mercilessly by her Madam, Shona. She was raped numerous times by every man who visited the brothel. Her hands were tied with rope and a hot iron rod was inserted into her innards till she was half dead and had to be hospitalised. In the hospital, the ward boys raped her at night and left her in a pool of blood. Yet Kajol survived. She was a survivor. She returned to Sonagachi after a few days as an absolutely transformed person. Once she owned the profession of prostitution and spread her legs before men, she realised that she need not starve and get beaten. She became a different human being, or rather a species different from a human being, a half-dead, half-alive demonic entity with not a drop of mercy or forgiveness in her.

After spending ten years in Sonagachi, Kajol was sold in Mumbai by her Madam and started working in Kamathipura under Maya, the matre dame of this world of sin. Had Kajol not been around, Maya would have tormented and silenced a lot of women with her perversions and sadomasochism. Kajol had become that strong wall that stood against the wickedness of Maya, for Kajol believed in a code, a code to keep the women in the trade safe from perverted attacks. All was not fair game in her world. While it was true that they were sex workers, Kajol believed that they should have the dignity of a human existence. Kajol had dethroned Maya and had freed the women and herself. No one owned them now. They were free. They traded as per their own convenience and stood by each other. Whenever they were not in the mood for work, physically or psychologically, they sat back in their pockets and relaxed. Dethroning even an old and ageing Maya was not easy. Maya was a living devil, a horror who had threatened and tortured hundreds of girls, compelling them to sell their bodies against their will. Maya’s partner in crime, Gulab, a local gangster from Madanpura under whose empowering blanket Maya operated, had died by suicide after being betrayed by Maya with multiple men. Gulab had fallen in love with Maya and had mistakenly thought she loved him too. He had lived under that false happiness. But alas! Maya had never loved anyone. Her soul only craved power, money and sex. She had stopped resembling a human long ago. She had turned into an agency for profit.

Excerpted with permission from Invisible in Plain Sight: Voices From the By-Lanes of Kamathipura, Swati Pandey, Juggernaut.

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